Is it necessary to control anger? The answer is no! Controlling anger is not the best option.
Confused? I will make this clearer.
When you are angry, and you try to control the anger, one or more things might happen:
You will bottle up your anger, which is very unhealthy.
You will fight your anger, which means that you will focus your attention on it, trying to restrain it. However, what you focus on grows, so that though you try to control your anger, you get the opposite result. Focus your attention on controlling anger leads to inner fight, more attention paid to the anger, and consequently, more anger and frustration.
Anger is best controlled indirectly.
There are several things that you can do to avoid getting angry, or if you get angry, not let the anger grow. I have provided a few simple tips in my articles, but they don’t focus directly on controlling the anger. These tips can help you calm down, and they can help you prevent anger from culminating. You can use them in the various situations you encounter in your day-to-day life.
However, anger often rises over and again, and you will need to use these tips and methods repeatedly.
- Isn’t it better to be able to avoid anger altogether?
- Is there a way to stay calm, and not let people and external situations make you angry?
- Is it possible to stay calm and relaxed in your everyday life, and at the same time act with energy, inner strength and inner power?
The answer to all these questions is, yes, but like all the good things in life you need to spend time and energy and train yourself. You can rise above anger and not be disturbed by it, no matter what happens, by developing some degree of emotional detachment and inner peace.
When you possess emotional detachment and inner peace, you will hardly not need to control anger, because your mind would learn to stay calm, naturally and easily. This is a gradual process, as the emotional detachment and inner peace grow, anger will lose its power over you.
At first, you will begin to be more aware when anger arises, and it would be easier not to get involved with it. Sometimes, you will feel, as if the anger does not belong to you.
As you continue to make progress, you will be able to detach yourself from anger, and it will begin to lose its hold on you.
What Is anger?
- It is an emotional response to situations and people.
- It is a feeling caused by the discrepancy between what happens and your expectations.
- It rises when you don’t get what you want.
- It is a feeling evoked by fear, jealousy and frustration.
- People feel angry when they are threatened.
- People feel angry when they feel they are being ridiculed, and when they are not treated fairly.
- When someone talks aloud, he or she often create anger in other people.
- Failure, unhappiness and lack of satisfaction also lead to anger.
- Delays and frustrations are also among the reason that lead to anger.
If anger makes you more assertive, and gives you the energy and motivation to make things right, it might. to some extent, be useful. However, if it makes you to act irrationally, endanger yourself and others, and make you feel bad, then it is completely unnecessary.
You need to exercise some self-control and discipline to get rid of it.
This is not an article that covers anger from the physical and psychological standpoint. The purpose of the article is just give some ideas and understanding about what is anger, and point to certain working solutions that might not appeal to everyone, i.e, emotional detachment and inner peace.
Imagine how free, calm and happy you would be, if you could stop getting upset by what people say or do, let go of negative thoughts and emotions, and avoid taking things personally.